Do you often say “Yes” when you’d rather say “No?” If you just replied “Yes,” well — there you go again. Wouldn’t you have rather answered “No” to this question? Easier said than done though, I know, but is it really audacity to speak this truth when it is warranted and appropriate? New Oxford defines audacity two ways:
1) the willingness to take bold risks
2) rude or disrespectful behavior
If you’re harboring the notion that it is bold, risky, rude or disrespectful to say “No,” then therein lies the misguided obligation. Ideally, no one should know what’s better for you than you and clearly stating such boundaries can be a healthy shift, especially for those who make people-pleasing an art form. Try to recall a moment when a clear “No” was brewing at your core, but by the time this “No” feeling made its way to your mouth, poof — out came a “Yes.”
Keep it simple and follow your body’s lead on this one. Practice with small and uneventful “Noes.” Pay attention and if you find that you suffer from trigger mouth with the “Yes” thing, then take a moment before you answer. Whoever it is can wait. This is your choice and an inaccurate offering can send off a cascading tide of misinformation, unmet expectations and resentment. Now who in the world has the audacity to do that?
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#1 by mr.black on March 2, 2010 - 7:02 pm
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i’ve learned to say “yes” to me. good work ds.
#2 by David Sonatore on March 3, 2010 - 7:18 am
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Ah, the next level up. good work mr. black.
#3 by Loretta Joan Gooding on March 23, 2010 - 9:22 pm
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“No”, I mean “yes”, or…”why not?” The trick is…follow the first lead.
#4 by David Sonatore on March 24, 2010 - 11:35 am
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Yep, the heart’s quicker than the head…